grief: a special photo

i received this today.

image

A passport photo Dad kept in his wallet, I’m guessing ever since it was taken. I remember when we did it, vaguely, probably in the photo booth in Woolworths. Today is Father’s Day and it seems apt to have received such a special photograph, special to Dad and now, special to us.  It’s apt because photos of the family are all he ever really wanted when it came to receiving gifts on Father’s Day and often on birthdays and Christmas for that matter. He loved seeing the faces of his family members and being reminded of special times together. One of his greatest ambitions in life (above any career ones) was to be a good Dad and one reason he succeeded, I think, was because he enjoyed us so thoroughly. As a Mum I know how much of a choice that is, one to be made every day. I can focus on what I don’t or can’t have… A full night’s sleep, the ability to do what I want when I want, a clean car and house… Or I can focus on my children and what a huge blessing they are. I can embrace life. As it is. Now. Like my Dad embraced this moment and crammed us all in a photo booth on an outing in town.

This weekend has been jam-packed with special times and I will post some photos soon. I’m desperate to get photos up around my house so I am deliberate about enjoying memories and the special people I’m connected to.

i have felt a heavy sadness during this fun weekend and I have shed many tears over this photo today, but it will take pride of place somewhere here, like it did in Dad’s wallet for some 20 odd years,

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2 comments

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  1. rachel

    What a lovely entry. It is amazing to draw inspiration from our fathers. It sounds like your dad really imparted how precious time is with family and friends. It’s a reminder for me to focus on what I do have whilst trying to come to terms with this huge gap that is left. Love u x

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