grief does not change you, it reveals you

I miss my Dad.

i want to talk to him. To tell him about a proud parenting moment I had this weekend. I want to talk about baking and cooking. And quote funny programmes we watched together. And reminisce.

I want to hear his voice, his laugh, his witty one-liners. His affirming words.

So much has changed lately. Some of it is good…. Some I didn’t ask for, nor want. Sometimes I have a strong, though fleeting, feeling that I’m living someone else’s life. Is this really the road I live on? That house, it’s my home…!?

Change is a funny business. We can’t control life and all the things that come and go. But, how we change, for the better or for the worse, is something that will always be ours to choose. Something I want to change? I want to (and intend to) live in the moment, connect, make something of nothing, have fun and be fun. Like my Dad.

Pondering this quote… Any thoughts?

“Grief does not change you, Hazel. It reveals you.”
John Green, The Fault in Our Stars

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